Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize