so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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