Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
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