haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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