oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
