Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
