Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
