I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
drinking out of a sandbucket again
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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