So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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