Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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