we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
