This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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