Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize