So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
