he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
