I think I just saw someone hide a body.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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