I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Randomize
