I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
