I just made out with a guy for $7.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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