Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
