The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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