yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize