yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
