Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
