happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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