I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
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