Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize