If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
