I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Randomize
