did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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