Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
third nipple confirmed
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Randomize
