hell yes lets make some ravioli
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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