Little spoons don't ask big questions
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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