it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize