Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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