You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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