You really coming over, don't trick.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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