i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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