when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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