I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
