we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize