Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize