i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
