super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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