i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Randomize
