We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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