i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
