If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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