okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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