Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
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